I have moved! Im sorry for the inconvience.
My new blog is:
marisbush.wordpress.com
Come check it out!!
Saturday, July 28, 2007
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
This is it!!
I just found this picture on a friend's facebook in cookeville. I know some of you might not believe this but I jumped off of this cliff. This was the most daring thing I have ever done!!!! I look at this picture and still cannot believe that I did this.
Friday, July 13, 2007
Almost Home..
My sweet husband is almost home! 2 more hours!! I cannot wait to see him:) This will be the start of 3 fun weeks with my man home! My wonderful inlaws are in town until Monday and we are having a blast. Tomorrow is Jimmie and Laura's wedding!!! My sweet Ginger is in town, I got my haircut and gosh I am so excited about the next 2 days!! Did I mention I can't wait to see my hot husband!?!?!
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
Monday, July 9, 2007
Trying to make a difference...
I need to vent.
In highschool I never ever struggled with weight issues. I was always so skinny. So much of it was because I was playing softball, basketball and constantly active. The last year or so I have really slowed down. I sit a lot more at work and work on the computer, I have a nice comfortable house that I love to come home and watch TV in, I am not playing any sports and honestly I have just gotten very lazy. Needless to say, I have been gaining some weight. All of the sudden my legs, hips, and love handles have grown a little.
Can I just confess that this has become the BIGGEST struggle for me? I feel defeated before I walk out the door to work out. I CANNOT make myself do something and half the time my mind is thinking, "Maris- you should just give in. You are never going to look like you did in highschool again, you should just let it go and give in." I feel very very unattractive and hardly any of my clothes are fitting. I am so very discouraged. You have no idea how hard it is to write this blog. I am sitting here crying knowing this is a reality and that in order for it to change I have to do something. My mind is filled with lies that convince me to just keep laying on the couch. I try so hard to eat good, but all of the sudden food has become comfort and all I think about. What is happening to me? I know that beauty is on the inside and you don't have to be skinny to be beautiful and all of that stuff that we should tell ourselves. This is past all of this. There comes to be a line you cross when you know that your body does not naturally look like that and it is only because you have been lazy. Only you know what you are supposed to look like.
I just got back from running/walking. I did it for 20 mins and thought I was going to die. I am about to do Tae Bo (which I love).
I guess I just wrote this to get all of it out and confess my sin and struggles. This all consumes my thoughts and has me down more than anybody probably knows about. My poor husband is probably running out of things to say and has no idea how big this issue really is to me. I just feel defeated and I guess I am needing help or prayers. I want so badly to run in a half marathon or some kind of race. I throw up the defense mechanism all the time. I honestly do not think I could do it. That is why I don't try. I would be afraid that I would quit and let everybody down. I don't know why I am writing all of this but honestly it just feels really good to let it out. So there you go. These are my biggest life struggles and I have no clue where to start. Any suggestions?
In highschool I never ever struggled with weight issues. I was always so skinny. So much of it was because I was playing softball, basketball and constantly active. The last year or so I have really slowed down. I sit a lot more at work and work on the computer, I have a nice comfortable house that I love to come home and watch TV in, I am not playing any sports and honestly I have just gotten very lazy. Needless to say, I have been gaining some weight. All of the sudden my legs, hips, and love handles have grown a little.
Can I just confess that this has become the BIGGEST struggle for me? I feel defeated before I walk out the door to work out. I CANNOT make myself do something and half the time my mind is thinking, "Maris- you should just give in. You are never going to look like you did in highschool again, you should just let it go and give in." I feel very very unattractive and hardly any of my clothes are fitting. I am so very discouraged. You have no idea how hard it is to write this blog. I am sitting here crying knowing this is a reality and that in order for it to change I have to do something. My mind is filled with lies that convince me to just keep laying on the couch. I try so hard to eat good, but all of the sudden food has become comfort and all I think about. What is happening to me? I know that beauty is on the inside and you don't have to be skinny to be beautiful and all of that stuff that we should tell ourselves. This is past all of this. There comes to be a line you cross when you know that your body does not naturally look like that and it is only because you have been lazy. Only you know what you are supposed to look like.
I just got back from running/walking. I did it for 20 mins and thought I was going to die. I am about to do Tae Bo (which I love).
I guess I just wrote this to get all of it out and confess my sin and struggles. This all consumes my thoughts and has me down more than anybody probably knows about. My poor husband is probably running out of things to say and has no idea how big this issue really is to me. I just feel defeated and I guess I am needing help or prayers. I want so badly to run in a half marathon or some kind of race. I throw up the defense mechanism all the time. I honestly do not think I could do it. That is why I don't try. I would be afraid that I would quit and let everybody down. I don't know why I am writing all of this but honestly it just feels really good to let it out. So there you go. These are my biggest life struggles and I have no clue where to start. Any suggestions?
Sunday, July 8, 2007
Celebrating Jimmie and Laura!
Today is finally here! We are approaching the week of the Ingram wedding. Today we get to throw a shower for our sweet Laura. It is so much fun to celebrate your friends in one of the most exciting times of their lives. I know that there are a couple friends in the state of Texas that would love to be here with us today but its ok we will see you soon! I cannot wait to take some pics of everybody and put them on here, especially at the wedding. We love you Laura and can't wait for you to relax, open presents and have fun during this part of the journey with your husband (almost!!)
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